I had alot. Friends, money, time, chances: I had a life to love. For a while, I was there in perfect euphoria and now I am here. For once, my life went perfect. But of reasons, of ways I did not recognize... I FELL. LIFE FELL.
I do not hate life. Even if at times it made me cry and think it was a bit unfair. In fact, I am astonished of how it worked for everybody. Life, I define as a nonstop journey that is both excruciating and fulfilling, exciting and frightful, interesting and unsure. Life is something you drive alone living you with freedom to choose where to go. Life, for me is amazing.
I'll show you why.
Once I was with alot of people who lured me with love they told me WAS UNCONDITIONAL. The company they offered was the one you thought would last for a lifetime. But like usual epics, I WAS WRONG. For a moment I lived with the little home they help me build around me. That little home they too, ruined. A few stayed but their quantity I can count on only one hand offering me little hopes and wonders. Many from the few stayed for a little while but then grew tired later and like the others, left. Until there was none.
I denied I was melancholic about the many losing I have experienced but tonight... I AM PUTTING PRIDE in the backseat and saying YES, I AM HURT. (Now I feel better). Haters might like how I react to this but I don't care. It's not Karma anyway. It's purely God's act of pulling his daughter back from the artificial world she childishly, impulsively built without HIM.
AMAZING...right? That's Life.
Of the many mistakes I did in the past, God still pursued to get me back. He never forgets, He always sees.
Though deep within, I'm still hurting, I can brag and say I CAN STILL BE THERE BACK WITH EUPHORIA.. I can say that THERE WILL BE ALOT MORE THAN WHAT I LOST OUT THERE-- WITH HIM.
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